Saturday, February 15, 2014

Well, That took me by surprise!

A lot has happened since November. I had planned on writing about Thanksgiving, how I was doing after my hard days, Christmas, and so many other things since my last post. I had a million posts (okay, so I'm overexagerating a bit...) planned out in my head to write. NONE of them were written, started, or anything else. They aren't even in my head anymore. They've been pushed out by other, more important, things.

You see, in early December I got sick after eating at McDonalds. It kind of threw me that I ate the same thing as my children (chicken nuggets...and they didn't taste the greatest to me), yet they didn't get sick at all...My husband on the other hand, did, but he had something completely different than us...and he had been back on the boat too.

So the next day I still wasn't feeling all that great but my husband wasn't doing too bad. I took a pregnancy test. Low and behold, I was pregnant with bundle of joy number 3!

I did okay over the next few weeks while waiting for Christmas to pass, my husband to leave and my first appointment to finally be here. Before that appointment I went into the ER for extreme nausea. They put me on Zofran and found I had a bladder infection so they also gave me antibiotics. Went to that first boring appointment and got it over with, along with my first blood tests. About two weeks later, I landed myself in the ER again, this time due to spotting at 12 weeks and a pain in my side. Everything was fine with baby and was told to keep an eye on the pain.

This pregnancy has been so COMPLETELY different from my first two pregnancies. I call this my "real" pregnancy. I was on the couch for almost 2 months with severe nausea. I seriously couldn't get up without wanting to run to the bathroom. How I got through without Josh there for the majority of it, I have no clue. We had meals made for us, but we ended up not eating most unfortunately (most people made chicken meals...I can not eat chicken this pregnancy. I try a little about once a week...it just tastes disgusting and if I actually eat a meal made with chicken, I am sick for at least two days...I miss chicken! It looks and sounds soooooo good to me!) I also have zero energy most days. I just want to lay in bed and sleep all day. Now that I'm 14 weeks along, it's getting a little better thankfully. I just have to remember not to push myself too much when I do have energy (something I'm extermely bad at!)

I have started doing Zumba 1-2 times a week. It feels good to be dancing again. I just need to remember to bring snacks for after class so I don't have to rush to get something to eat because I'm nauseous.

I'm also basically eating a vegetarian diet. I'm not sure how I'd do with beef, but I'm wanting some...BAD! I'm too scared to try it though. I do not want to feel sick from eating food. I do, however know I can eat sausage 1-2 times a day depending on what kind and in what. I eat a Sausage burrito from Burger King almost every single morning. If I don't eat that, it's usually a sausage and gravy bowl by Jimmy Dean...it pretty much has to be sausage though. I just found out I can have Zuppa Toscano from Olive Garden in the afternoon also. Soooo nice that I can eat meat more than once a day!

I go through my phases still...that is something that has been the norm for all three pregnancies. I'll go a week or two only wanting a specific menu item from a certain place. I have to eat there almost every day no matter what. Then it's on to something else.

Craving-wise, those Sausage Burritos are a must have all the time. My breakfast cravings usually subside around week 10-12...I don't see this one going away any time soon. I also craved Orange Juice for a couple weeks. It was the only thing I could drink. The last craving is Peanut Butter M&Ms. I keep a BIG party bag in my car and just bought another one for the house. I love peanut butter!

Aversions really are only anything that is sweet. Chocolate, ice cream, candy, frozen yogurt...anything sweet just turns me green. I took the kids to BluBerry Frozen Yogurt yesterday for a special treat and just being in the shop made me a little nauseous.

Chicken and milk make me sick. I was able to drink milk while pregnant with the other two (I was lactose intollerant starting at 17, I've been fine with dairy since having Ric). I'm kind of nervous as to what this means for my dairy habits after this baby is born

Drinks...it has to have some kind of fruit flavoring in it if it's water. I can also drink a cup of tea or two a day, which is a nice change of pace after only being able to drink fruity water for so long. It has to be pretty plain or just barely sweetened with a flavored creamer. I've just been going and buying Earl Grey Latte's from Starbucks right now. It would be a waste for me to buy liquid creamer to make it at home when I don't know if this tea craving will last more than a week or two.

Let's go back to energy. Yes, I'm finally getting some back. Looking at my house, drains it. My house is a disaster. I wasn't able to get off the couch so the kids had the run of the house. They dragged out all their toys from the toy room and all their books from the bins we keep them in. There is garbage from the constant fast food runs we have had to make for lunch and dinner (because I don't have the energy to make anything whatsoever). They have been good about choosing between McDonalds and Burger King. I've been eating Taco Bell...every....day... They have some pretty nice options for vegetarian meals...and you can make almost anything vegegtarian from there. I'm going to try a nacho cheese chalupa pretty soon...see if they can just fill it with beans and veggies for me. It sounds wonderful.

I did make some progress on cleaning my house. My kitchen floor was FULL of garbage (food, recycling stuff, cat food cans, and regular garbage). I sorted and broke down all the recycling and put the garbage into bags to throw out...then actually made the three trips to take the majority of it out. I felt accomplished...and run down and sick from those three trips. Now I just have to get the big garbage bag out from under the sink and brave the hallway bathroom for diaper garbage (daughter didn't tell me it was full and started using the regular garbage in there...it smells horrid...) I should also take out the garbage from my room so it doesn't start stinking.

I'm hoping my mom will be here soon and I will get more cleaning done. I want to get Cara and Ric's rooms ready for toys. I also need to get Ric's room ready for a new bed...we're thinking a bunk bed...and Cara's bed needs to be sold so we can get her a loft or bunk bed also. Her full is just too big for her room. Once Josh is home we will start converting the toy room into the nursery. He just has to buy moldings and paint them/put them up and it's ready for move in (of course, after all the toys are moved out). I need to buy a new crib too. I'm reusing Cara's Under the Sea nursery theme since we still have everything for it and the room is painted for it...and it's gender neutral.

And the kids are now up and begging to be out of my room to play, so I guess this post is done! More later (I hope it doesn't take as long though!)

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Hard time of the year

This week has gotten to me again this year. Last year? Nothing. It started quite awhile ago this year actually.

The younger women of my church had a "girls night" at a local restaurant chain. I went because I needed some time away from my kids (Josh was underway and I was going insane!) I was having a great time then suddenly some of the women with tweens and teens started talking about how they "Couldn't believe ________ was _____ years old already!" It hit me then that my first baby, the baby I lost when I was 15, would've been 13 years old that upcoming summer. My heart sank and I became really reserved, trying to hold back tears. I've not been hit that hard by that realization in a REALLY long time! I couldn't say anything since about 99.8% of the people I know (including my parents) had no idea I lost a child. About 95% of the people I know have no idea I had even been raped.

I got over the sadness I felt within a couple weeks, but it was still in my mind...way at the back, but not quite buried like it normally is. Then this week happens and since it was in my mind to begin with, it hit me. Not as hard as my realization earlier in the year...since that came out of nowhere...but it still was on my mind most of the day on November 6. It's still on my mind today, obviously, but it's not as prominent as it was on Wednesday. I'm doing better already with not letting it run me down any and am trying to focus on the positives of my life. I have two amazing children, my husband is in the home stretch of his Navy Career, I'm alive, I have a VERY supportive family (in both my immediate family, my in-laws and my church family)...the list could go on for an extraordinary amount of time.

So why did it hit me this year when it hasn't hit me the last few years? I have no clue. Josh thinks possibly stress since I have been fairly stressed this year about a lot of different things. The kids had me stressed out to the max the whole last underway, I've been stressed out about financials these last few months, I haven't been exercising like I should...that really helped me out...the running, Zumba and Pole Dancing. We can't afford to renew our gym membership and I can't even afford the $20 a week for Zumba and Pole Class that is outside of the gym. I could still run, but I can't afford the clothes that are appropriate for running in the cold/wet weather we are having right now...and I HATE running on treadmills! I found that out when we did have a gym membership. So in the end, I'm just going to chalk all this up to stress with no stress relief from exercise.

On top of the rape playing repeatedly in my head this last week, I was reminded that my friend Adam passed away 2 years ago on Wednesday. That hit me hard too. I knew he had passed, but I didn't remember which day or when. I've been thinking of Adam a lot lately. I've missed him dearly since I graduated high school, but I still ran into him in town on occasion while I was still living there. Once I moved, I think I saw him maybe once before he passed. I've been remembering his hugs, his pep talks, his smile, his blue hair when he changed it once at the end of my senior year, his personality and his loving nature. No one could stay mad at him when he was a jerk because there was always some reason he was being a jerk...ALWAYS...and it never really had anything to do with us. He was a strong man, even when he was really only a boy. He rarely asked for help but was always asking what he could do when one of his friends even looked like they were starting to get down. In my senior year of high school, he got me through the day when I ran into Steve every time I turned around, when someone started harassing me for whatever reason, he was my rock my senior year and he was only a freshman. I feel like I failed him after I left school and I never got to say good bye. He was a much better friend than I and he deserved so much better from me.

This post has gone a much different way than I had planned and that's okay. I think this is where I should end it though. I don't know what else to say or even how to truly end this, so I'm just going to end it here. I hope you all have a wonderful day!

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Candyman - Top 10

Back to being late. I have no clue why I can never get this done on time! Guess I'll have to start planning a little better.

Yesterday I took the hubby to work, took care of the kids, did some online stuff, talked to my sister in law for a few minutes (if you can, please keep her in your thoughts and prayers, she's going in for a biopsy surgery consult on Monday...it's pretty nerve wracking and worrisome for all), then headed out for an appointment. I left the house at 11AM and didn't return home until about 4PM. No wonder I didn't really want to be on the computer anymore after that. I did a few chores I needed to get done then sat on the couch for the rest of the night. Thankfully the kids asked for PB&J for dinner and I was more than happy to let my husband make that for them. I had chips...then ice cream after the kids went to bed. Yeah....I'm healthy like that.

Anyway....Yesterday's Tuesday Top 10 (which I'm linking up through Poe at Many Waters) was about Candy since Halloween is coming up...TOMORROW! Where has October gone? The end of the year is going by WAY too fast, especially with my husband leaving again for awhile at the beginning of the year. I have less than a month with him left on offcrew. So not looking forward to the upcoming oncrew season...however, this *should* be his last time out before he's out of the Navy.

Now without further ado....

My top 10 favorite candy (in no particular order) is:

1. Hershey bars - sometimes you just want chocolate
2. Peanut Butter M&M's - Soooooo yummy!
3. Andes Mints - I love minty goodness....and chocolate
4. Junior Mints - Just a different kind of mint...I love these at the movies!
5. Snickers - Chocolate, Caramel and peanuts....yum!
6. Kit Kat - They are chocolate covered wafer bars....can I have some in the different flavors too? May have to try some homemade versions!
7. Frozen Reese's Peanut Butter Cups - Yes...they HAVE to be frozen or I don't enjoy them as much...
8. Peanut M&M's - Because sometimes you don't want peanut butter
9. Almond Joy - Love the flavors and the almond cuts a bit of the sweet which is nice
10. Butterfinger - Again with the peanut butter, only it's little sticky crunchy wafer ribbons of it...nom nom!

Speaking of Halloween and Candy...my kids went Trunk or Treating at our church this past week. They were awesome! My husband and I did a trunk two years in a row, but then when Ric got a little bigger I decided I would rather take the kids around as a family instead of taking turns taking them around so we both got to experience Halloween with them. So...this is the second year (maybe third...) we haven't done a trunk. I think we've got about 2 more years before Cara and Ric can go around by themselves in the parking lot and just check in with us often. I can't wait to start doing trunks again though! I really am hoping we will still be in Washington to enjoy these memories with our friends here.

Anyway, here's a couple pictures from the event. Cara was Rapunzel (Tangled) and Ric was a Knight in Shining Armor (thanks to Josh who made the costume! It only cost us about $8 for the extra glue!)




Look at that turn out! And I couldn't even get everyone in it! Unfortunately my camera died right after this shot (forgot to charge up the batteries...ugh!) so I only have iPhone pictures from Josh's phone after that...they didn't turn out well enough for me to post on here.

Hope you all have a great rest of the week and a very fun, safe and Happy Halloween! We haven't figured out if we're going out trick or treating again tomorrow (probably not...) or just staying home to watch a movie (Harry Potter anyone?) but either way, it will be family time for sure!

What are you doing to celebrate Halloween?

Monday, October 28, 2013

EEEK! Almost a week late!

So I've had a fun and busy week which has included a sick child. I thought it was a growth spurt and allergies, it was bronchitis. She's still coughing, but her fever has been completely gone for a little over 24 hours. She seems to feel much better too, but still sleepy and lazy. Hoping that leaves soon! I miss the energy of that firecracker!

So last week's Tuesday Top 10 with Poe was Ten Facts About You. I can tell you a million things about myself and I still feel like it's the same thing every time. I don't really remember what I've said and what I haven't...so let's hope this isn't all just old news stuff to most of you :)

1. I am the youngest child of three and only girl. My brother K is 6 years older than me and my brother J is 4 years 2 days older than me. He used to tell my mom I was his favorite birthday gift...then we started growing up.

2. I love animals! I've had 3 dogs, 2 cats, 3 birds, numerous fish, a leopard frog, a crayfish and a garter snake as pets. I can not wait for my yard to be fenced in and be financially and emotionally ready for another dog! Right now it's our cat, Sparrow and our fish, Barnafin Red.

3. I love photography! I'm not into it for money or anything (which is partially why I don't really care to go to school for it, nor do I bother with photoshop) but I love to take pictures. It's really awesome when something comes out either exactly as I imagined it or even better! I just love having fun with my cameras!

4. Food is a huge weakness of mine. I love eating just about anything. I enjoy what I eat and I eat what I enjoy. Lately it's been hard to figure out what I even want to eat because so much repulses me (no, not pregnant as far as I know). The only thing that always sounds good and actually calms my stomach is chocolate. So weird!

5. I have two amazing children. Cara will be 5 next month, Ric turned 3 in August. I can not believe that much time has gone by since they arrived on this Earth. My husband and I do want one more but we're on a time restraint. If I don't get pregnant by December, we will probably stop trying (we did have an easy time getting pregnant with our other two which is why we've only given it so little time).

6. I danced for 16 years before having to quit due to an ankle injury. I did tap, jazz, ballet, gymnastics, lyrical, acro-jazz, hawaiian, hip hop, modern, Irish step, a ballroom class and as many other kinds as I could. I still love to dance and do Zumba when I can to itch that scratch. I can not wait to be able to afford to go back. The type I never thought I'd do, but enjoy thoroughly (because it's also the most challenging I've ever done) is Pole Dance! A good friend of mine owns a studio out here called Dolphin Dance and the classes are amazing. When I can afford it, I'll be back to Mommy and Me to get my fit on!

7. My husband works in a tin can. He has one more underway and he should be done. He's been in the Navy for a little over 8 years and will be done less than a month before his 9 year mark. We are excited about this yet terrified because we have NO clue what's next!

8. I am a singer. I may not be as good as I used to be, and I was never the greatest at it, but I enjoy it and love it so dearly! Before I had my son I was an alto through and through. Now....I can hit some alto notes, but I am much more comfortable in the tenor range. Right now I sing on a whim for fun and am in my church's choir.

9. Speaking of church...I was raised a Catholic and when I was 18 I started going to church with my (now) husband. He went to a WELS (Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod) Church. I started taking the Bible Information Class and just after my 19th birthday I became a member. I have been mostly happy ever since. I do not see completely eye to eye on everything but it's mostly when they put their religious views into the government which I think is completely wrong when not everyone believes the same thing.

10. I am not big into debating politics or religion. I try not to talk about them. I don't talk about religion much because I know what I believe and that's good enough for me. I'm still not comfortable enough with the bible to reference or argue anything about it. My true friends and I can talk about it comfortably (since most of my friends are of other religions and we accept that about each other) but with strangers, not so much. I usually feel attacked by strangers when it comes to politics and religion. Not cool.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Tuesday Top 10 - again, a day late!

I'm hoping SOMEDAY I will make this link up ON Tuesday! I have no excuses this week. I was on the computer yesterday going through email and really, I forgot about it. Maybe because my hubby was home on Monday or maybe because Poe's posts come to me a day late...I don't know. I really have no excuse. I'm doing it anyway!

I'm linking up with Poe at Many Waters for this great and rambly post. I'm tired. I've been up for almost an hour already and it's not yet 5AM. "Why in the world have you been up since before 4AM," you ask? Well...there is this going on...and it's LOUD:




They had a different attachment on the end a little earlier and it makes my whole house shake. I'm going back to bed (hopefully) when my husband gets up for work. There goes my plans to take him to work and meet for part of a playdate today. I think playdate time will be naptime as my kids aren't sleeping well through this either...and they're both in my bed now. I have NO clue when my son arrived in bed with us, but my daughter woke up about 20 minutes after me, terrified. I've never seen her run so fast from her room. She sat on the couch with me and watched for about 5 minutes before I convinced her to go lay in my bed. Poor thing. I can hear her now struggling to sleep. I feel bad for her. It's going to be a very long day in my household.

On to the link up though!

This week's Top 10 is products! I'm not one to really care much about "things" but there are some things I can't live without. Here they are in no particular order:

1. Washer/Dryer - Yes, I know how to hand wash, however, I think I'd be buying new clothes instead with how much we go through...

2. Stove/Oven - If I had to cook over a fire for this stuff, no problem, I love the convenience though...and it warms the house a little more on those cool days!

3. Crock Pot - How much easier does it get to cook? I love mine on those busy/lazy days!

4. My car - I have a 2010 Honda Pilot. I was thinking of getting a van but then I looked into my friend's van and thought "I have one more seat in here than they have and it's not a big deal for my oldest to climb over the seat if we need to move her to the back row." I can put 6 carseats in my car if I need to. If there are no children in my car, I can fit 7 full grown adult passengers in there and have it be mostly comfortable. This is the car I will have to carpool teenagers around to dances, soccer, dance classes, dates, etc. It's a great car. When we don't have the carseats in, we can put the two back rows down and my family of 4 can sleep in the back fairly comfortably (with just me and the kids, we can do it with just the very back row down!)

5. My iPad/iPod - Technically the iPod is for the kids, but I have my music on it for the gym/running...which I need to get back to. I miss it. I don't think I'd be as happy without my iPad now. I use it as my laptop most of the time. I have a keyboard I can use with it and do on occasion (like when I write a blog post from it). I love the games that I can play, the E-Readers, cooking apps, kids apps, tv apps, etc. I have my bible on it. My church's synod has an app that I have on it. My contacts are there, notes, etc. It's basically my lifeline.

UGH! House shakey attachment is back on and going...so glad I didn't go back to sleep when I was going to!
6. My cameras - I have four cameras. Two I never use (one of those is technically my husband's), out of the two left...one is broken at the moment...that leaves my Nikon D40. I am in no way, shape or form a professional photographer, but I wouldn't trade having a more professional like camera for the world! I grew up using one like this only it wasn't automatic and it was a 35mm (I do not always use the auto on my camera! I like using it in manual). The first real time I was allowed to use this camera was in France. A lot of my pictures turned out like crap, but there were some that were amazing. When I go back, I will have MY camera and be able to take some great photos of some of the things that didn't turn out so great the first time around. I'm excited for this trip. Whenever my youngest hits 10/12 we will be making the trek and we are bringing my parents along too. The first time I went, I was with my mom and my high school's french club. What an experience! I can't wait to do it again!

7. Our Keurig - I don't really drink much coffee, but it makes my tea making go much faster. No longer do I HAVE to boil the water before being able to steep my tea to perfection...I just put my cup under the keurig without a k-cup in it and I have a piping hot cup of water ready and waiting for a tea bag. I can also make a cup of swiss miss fast with it. My husband does make coffee in it, so it's not a complete waste on us. I also enjoy making my iced tea in it on occasion. I love Tazo Zen and Tazo Awake iced. I don't think I've ever had either hot. My hot tea of choice is a good chamomile or Sweet Dreams (I believe it's called that...it's a mint/chamomile combo...I usually only drink that if my stomach is upset).

8. Our TVs - Some days I can't live without it. Today it will be watching my kids if they don't want to take a nap with me. It will be on ALL day today. We just got rid of cable so it's all Netflix all the time until we get Amazon Prime or Hulu Plus (I think we're going to go with Amazon so we can watch some Team Umizoomi!) but it's worth it to have that extra peace of mind that my kids are okay and entertained while I'm sleeping on the couch.

9. Planners/Calenders - I am an addict. Free printable menu planners scatter my house, I usually have 2-3 calenders hanging on my walls in any given year (amazingly I only have one this year!), I have a small calender in my purse and I also have a student planner on my husband's desk for bills/plans too. If there is an offer for a free calender, I usually take it. Any kind of printable, I'll download it and use it. I'm actually searching for a good weekly/monthly calender with plenty of room and lines to do a prayer calender with. One that is pretty and functional along with free (because I really and truly can't afford to pay anything right now). If anyone has any leads for that, please let me know!

10. External Hard Drives - I have a big one...storage wise, not size wise. My husband has the same one, only his is almost full, mine hardly has anything on it. Pictures don't take up much room when you have something this big (It says 1.36TB when I pull it up on the computer). I love it. I also love the cute flash drives...I have a few....A turtle, a monkey and a penguin. I would love to find an elephant and giraffe for the kids...technically the turtle and monkey are the kids' but they aren't allowed to touch them yet. They aren't even allowed near the computer yet unless we're right there and we invited them to be there.

So that wraps up my favorite products. It was hard for me to think of the last few...I actually took the Keurig and camera from Poe because I just couldn't get my mind to think of things. Now let's hope this construction stuff quiets down by 6:00AM like it's supposed to (I'm doubting it! Every time it's been "done" at 6, they haven't stopped working until at least 8!)

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Tuesday Top 10 - A Day Late!

So my friend Poe at Many Waters is doing a link up! Tuesday Top 10! I meant to do last week's Autumn Top 10, but forgot and didn't feel I had time while trying to catch up on my email and life in general. I'm pretty stressed right now with the whole government shutdown and all, but more stressed that we still haven't seen our last bonus installment when it feels like everyone else has gotten theirs. Kinda really stressed about that.

Anyway...this week I vowed to do it, and one day late, I am!

This week's Top 10 is TV Shows!

Now...I LOVE TV! I have WAY more than 10 favorite shows, and many of them tie for places in my top 10. Seriously, the shows I watch, I wouldn't watch them if they weren't in my top 10 favorites. I just wouldn't do it...and I really do watch about 20-30 shows on average (I love DVR and we only watch about 2 episodes a night together, and I watch my own personal shows that hubby doesn't watch during quiet time.)

So I guess I could make a few lists. Top 10 to watch with hubby, Top 10 to watch alone and Top 10 shows no longer aired. These lists wouldn't even cover the ones I WANT to watch and just haven't yet...or have watched a few, but I haven't watched enough episodes to warrant it as a favorite...YET.

So let's see...

My Top 10 shows in no particular order are:

(found all pictures on facebook and put them together in Word and Paint)

1. General Hospital - I have watched this show since I was in 7th grade with my mom. If I miss some, it's not a big deal, but I'm happy for DVR so I don't HAVE to miss any if I don't want to!


2. Once Upon A Time/Grimm - These I watch with the hubby...He hates missing them while he's underway because I'll still watch without him!

3. Elementary - This is a favorite, however I don't worry if I miss an episode due to falling asleep or hubby not being home. This is really one I only watch with the hubby.

4. Drop Dead Diva - This is one of my own and I have gotten my mom hooked on it too! Just something lighter to help me keep my sanity.

5. Teen Wolf - Yes, I wrote a whole blog post on this show. It is one of my guilty pleasures and I love it. I have found another lover of this show back in Monroe and even though I'm 3 hours behind her, we got to watch the Season 3 mid season finale together thanks to DirecTV. It was nice to have someone to talk to during commercials and afterward finally.


6. Glee - My husband used to watch this with me and now he doesn't really care. I love the music and dancing. The story line is getting a little middle schoolish for me so I really hope they end this series soon for that reason. It's just getting old and boring, but I just can't stop watching because the music is usually very well done.


7. Doctor Who/Torchwood - Oh yes...I am a Whovian. My husband got me interested in these shows and I think I'm more into it than him some days...actually I know I am...but I'm glad we can be nerds together sometimes. He also hates missing this one because I have no problem telling him about the ones he's missed in emails because I get so excited over it!


8. Covert Affairs/White Collar/Royal Pains - All USA Network and all amazing shows. I watch these with or without the hubby.


9. Rookie Blue - A cop series I only started watching because of Missy Peregrym and have grown to never want to miss an episode.


10. Orphan Black - I almost put this with Doctor Who and Torchwood, but it needed its own place on this list. This is an amazing show and has amazing acting on it. One actress plays multiple clones that are together quite often and are quite different personality/style/accent wise. She deserves multiple awards for her work!


And for the list of honorable mentions:

1. CSI/CSI: Miami
2. Law & Order/ Law & Order: SVU
3. Supernatural
4. The Vampire Diaries
5. Body of Proof
6. Switched at Birth
7. Bunheads
8. Arrow
9. Burn Notice - If they hadn't JUST finished this series up, it would be in my Top 10 list above!
10. Stargate SG-1/Stargate: Atlantis
11. Eureka - LOVE this one!
12. Gilmore Girls
13. 7th Heaven

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Thursday Thoughts: Beginnings

Beginnings.

So many things jump into my head when I see, hear, write, type this word. Memories of first things...Birth days, first lessons, first dates, first kiss, first deployments, first time away from all family on a long trip (not just a few days, or a couple weeks at camp with my brothers just moments away), the first time I got a new trick, first steps, first tooth, first curl (yes, I was ecstatic for my daughter's first curl!)

Then there are the not so good ones that I remember vividly too. First heartbreak, first time I found out I trusted the wrong person, first miscarriage, first rumor spread about me, first threat to my life...I could go on, but I think everyone gets the idea.

I love new beginnings...even if they're scary, but I don't like closing the door to the past. I remember way too many things and can't seem to do the "forget" part of forgive and forget.

Today I'm going to talk about the first time I saw my husband and the beginning of our relationship.

I had been engaged to a marine, my best male friend at the time. Things weren't going well, we both knew it, but we didn't want to end it since we supported each other so much and we did love each other, just not in the way we should've in order to get married. I was at college in Monroe, MI and he was on a base in Yuma, AZ. We talked every day, he went out on dates with girls and encouraged me to do the same thing (but with guys, of course!) We were always honest with anyone we would go out with that we were engaged to be married, but we had an open relationship for multiple reasons. I had him call me a few times with a date that didn't believe him and I explained that it was true, he wasn't some dog.

One day I went down to The Cellar (our hangout at the college) to play some pool with a guy I was starting to get to know and kinda liked a lot already, but didn't want to rush things since there was one thing I didn't know if I could accept about him. While we were playing pool, two more guys started playing at the table next to us. They were both kinda dorky (okay...so...I'm attracted to a lot of different types of guys...shoot me! I'm not horribly picky!) but the shorter skinnyish one caught my eye. He would give me "pointers" on how to play or how I could've made my shot better, and I would do the same (except I semi kinda knew what I was talking about...my uncle is an awesome pool player and tried teaching me the right way to play! And I feel weird saying that since the guy I was playing with...yeah he married a pro player!)

I didn't think much about this guy after that until a couple days later when my best friend (at the time) invited me to meet her crush during a friendly outing after choir. I said "Sure!" and invited my friend Evan, who I was hardcore crushing on again at this point...long story...) and his friend to come with me. I get to the restaurant (Pete's Garage) and who do I see? The pool guys. I was introduced to Big Mike first (the tall, bigger guy) and then Sarah's crush, Josh (the one I was attracted to). I immediately make sure to stick with Evan and flirt like crazy with him to keep my mind off Josh and the fact that this is the guy that my best friend likes...so I just can't possibly like him too since she has dibs pretty much. Evan and I had a great night. We hadn't laughed and flirted like that in a LONG time and it felt nice to be so in sync with someone. Josh ended up fishing for answers to some of his questions about me, including if I were single or not. He kind of suspected I was since he had just seen me a few days before with someone else and now I was with this guy. I explained the situation to him about Nick and he kind of just accepted it.

   

The next day Sarah and I were going to go dancing at a club down in Ohio after I just finished dancing for 5 hours at the dance studio I took lessons and was a student teacher at. I found out right before picking her up she invited Josh. I tried getting out of going...but it didn't happen. I was the only one with a car and license. So I picked up Sarah, then we went to get Josh. I called my friend Jason and we went to his house. I told him what we were doing and his friends were like "Hey can we tag along too?" Of course I said yes! We all went down and I danced as much as possible with Jason. I told him what was going on and he basically tried laying claim to me with Josh, talking about how wonderful I was and how he was going to ask me to be his girlfriend and how he's liked me for quite awhile but the timing had never been quite right, but it finally was. We started dancing again then everyone left (including Josh) to get water. I stayed on the floor and saw Jason coming back...but then he stopped and right in front of me appeared Josh. He took my hand and led me to a different room where it was a little quieter, but not much. We sat down and listened to some music then he pulled me into him and started talking into my ear so I could hear. He was funny. I laughed and smiled a lot. He held my hand the whole time, then suddenly, he kissed me.

That exact moment I realized I was going to hurt my best friend but I was going to gain another best friend and life partner. I knew I wanted to marry him and spend the rest of my life with him...and I had only officially met him 2 days before. And almost 11 years later (almost 8 of those married!), he still makes me feel that way with every kiss, every hand hold, every look he thinks I don't notice. I am truly thankful for that beginning.

                               

And my best friend, Sarah? We may not be BEST friends anymore, but she got over being mad at me in about 3 months when she realized how much of a jackass he really is to almost everyone. We still talk sometimes and I'm still happy and proud to call her my friend.